Superman: I think we first got the idea to do the Justice League when were we high. It was back in the early seventies and the popular thing to do was hang out in the California desert and drop mushrooms…then make out with Linda Ronstadt, for some reason. Yeah, we were young, famous and felt completely indestructible. Well, I know I did. Still do. Anyway, Aquaman and I were getting pretty toasted near Joshua Tree when he comes up with this crazy vision of all the superheroes banding together as a crime fighting unit. I just laughed and laughed because, well, no one ever took Aquaman seriously. For Christ sakes, he talked to fish. Plus, he dressed like Brian Eno.

Aquaman: Superman just kept mocking me, all the while punching me in the shoulder, so I was sort of slipping in and out of consciousness for a better part of the day. He was kind of an asshole back then because you could literally shoot him in the face and nothing would happen. If that doesn’t give your ego a hard-on I don’t know what will. But I kept pressing this idea I suddenly had of a Justice League, one in which we could pool our powers together to fight good…and maybe score a group health insurance plan on the cheap. I was working freelance back then and couldn’t really fight criminals because all it took was one broken nose and the hospital bills would wipe me out. I would literally run through massive battles covering my face and screaming the whole time. So no matter how hard Superman laughed—and he can laugh pretty fucking hard—I wouldn’t let go of the notion because I knew not only was it a great concept but a necessary one. The mackerel told me so.

Robin: When Batman first got the call to join the Justice League—which I think they were originally calling "Superman, Aquaman and Associates"—he didn’t take to it too kindly. But to be honest, Batman never really took anything well. We could be having a perfectly pleasant dinner at Chasen’s when for no reason his eyes would go dark, his mood would abruptly change and suddenly everybody was either a "traitor" or a "douche bag." Right then I’d know not only were we not staying for the Baked Alaska but also our car ride home would be an absolute nightmare. He could just turn like that. People like to think Batman always held up both the spirit and the letter of the law in his dealings with criminals. But they never saw him on a bad day with a tire iron at the ready. Woe be the parking violator who’d cross his path on those occasions. (Editor’s Note: Batman refused all requests for an interview).

Wonder Woman: I think the reason Batman didn’t care for the idea was that he knew Superman and Aquaman were going to hit him up for starter costs and real estate to build the Hall of Justice. Bruce Wayne had made a pretty good living managing such huge stars as Rich Little, Shields & Yarnell and The Bay City Rollers and they thought he would be good for at least a couple of million and maybe access to some industry parties. But what they didn’t know was that he had also lost a fortune on the Broadway musical production of "Jonathan Livingston Seagull." Trust me, if the plot didn’t scare away the audience Cheryl Tiegs’ singing voice certainly did.

Superman: Aquaman kept insisting we should invite this Wonder Chick to join the League, which I wasn’t too crazy about. I always envisioned our group as a sort of caped Rat Pack, only with more punching and less mob ties. But the idea of acknowledging the existence of other genders and races had suddenly become quite trendy in the early 70’s, so we decided it would be best to open up our admissions process.

Black Vulcan: I remember how excited I was when I fist got the call to be a member. I had been doing some regional crime fighting but was experiencing trouble breaking in on a national level, so the opportunity was tremendous, to say the least.

Apache Chief: They all knew I was actually Jewish. In fact, I originally signed on as "Magnifying Glassman." Y'know, "Could quickly scan legal documents and microfiche no matter what the font size!" But "A Man Called Horse" was a popular movie around that time so they decided to go another way. Still, a paycheck’s a paycheck.

Jayna (The Wonder Twins): Our agent called saying that the Justice League was looking for an all-inclusive crime fighting team and we should audition. Now, technically Zan and I aren’t even human so we thought we didn’t have a chance in hell. But luckily Robin and I had a mutual friend in Bernie Brillstein, who had produced the L.A. run of "Godspell" we were both in. So Bernie made a few calls on our behalf and before you could say, "activate" Zan and I were dubbed "The Wonder Twins." Of course, why they saddled us with that fucking monkey is anybody’s guess. You should never work with animals or children.

Samurai: "Everybody Was Kung-Fu Fighting" was everywhere on the radio back then, so the League decided they wanted an Asian crime fighter. I know it sounds corny and patently offensive but thank god for that crappy song. If it hadn’t been for that one-hit wonder I’d never have become a superhero and would have had no choice but to go back to my day job…neurosurgery.

The Italian Battalion: I must have sent in my reel at least a dozen times to the League only to keep getting back some reply like—"The Justice League is not interested in the so-called import/export business." What a bunch of bigoted assholes! One look at me and all they though was "RICCO Act." Can you believe that? An associate of mine offered to torch the Hall in retaliation but I called it off at the last moment when we realized our gentlemen’s club had been wiretapped by the Feds.

Aquaman: We opened our doors on September 19, 1971 and to say we were an instant hit would be an understatement.

Wonder Woman: You should have seen the headlines! "Justice League Prevents Multiple Airline Collisions Due to Disastrous ‘Take Your Child to Work’ Day at Air Traffic Control." "Justice League Saves Downtown from Gigantic Man-Made Vinegar and Baking Soda Volcano. Diabolical Fourth-Grader Now in Custody." "Justice League to Open ‘Super Supper’ Theme Restaurant Chain." You couldn’t buy publicity like that!

Robin: Even Batman was happy. Oh sure, he’d still have his bouts with depression, alcoholism, bulimia, prescription drug abuse, public disturbance and "cutting," but seeing him smile for that brief second after a successful mission would always remind me how little the down times really mattered.

Hawkman: I finally felt I was doing something good…instead of just doing travelling carny shows, on account of my freakish wingspan.

Green Lantern: We weren’t just a team in the beginning. We were a family. No one ever said to me, "Y’know, if we took away that ring of yours even the monkey could beat the shit out of you." Well, they didn’t say it the first few weeks.

Superman: We were heady with success and flush with cash. We could have anything we wanted. Weapons. The latest crime fighting technology. High school cheerleaders. Anything!

Paul Shaffer: I was brought on as Musical Director for the Justice League in the fall of 1974…a move that I still don’t understand to this day. But Superman kept saying. "We need someone to introduce and end our battles with musical flourishes, like ‘Ride of the Valkyries’ or Kraftwerk!" For some reason he had a thing for the German composers.

Black Vulcan: Who the hell needs music to fight crime? Or dancing girls? Or warm-up patter from Wayland Flowers and Madame? Those morons didn’t know a thing about fiscal responsibility! They just thought the good times would never end.

Wonder Woman: It wasn’t long before the core group started losing control, both of the business and of themselves. The League just transformed into a heavily endowed frat house. Dick jokes. Wrestling matches. Constantly snapping one another with towels. If it weren't for that giant two-way monitor in the control room those guys would have rode each other like cowboys.

Aquaman: Soon we were losing fights, sponsors, you name it. The only reason the Cold War didn’t end back in 1975 was that Batman was so coked up he flew Wonder Woman’s invisible jet straight into the Kremlin. Of course, to Moscow officials it just look like some weirdo in a cowl had somehow been thrown through a building, so they were more confused than angry. Still, tensions remained high.

Robin: By the end Batman wouldn't even appear in the Justice League. All his conversations had to be done with a split-screen.

The Flash: Everybody was on edge. If it wasn’t because we had lost both Portlands to Lex Luthor it was the constant infighting. People were always complaining about how certain members were getting more press or bigger roles.

El Dorado: Did you know I was the very first Latino superhero? But the League didn't know what to do with me. Eventually I just got bit parts as a gangbanger or drug lord.

Black Vulcan: Why couldn't they just call me "Vulcan"? Why "Black Vulcan"? It's not like anyone ever called Aquaman "Whitefish."

Aquaman: Before you knew it the entire organization had crumbled. It…it was horrible. I wept for days.

Apache Chief: I spent the next two weeks sitting shiva.

Superman: What tore apart the Justice League? Egos. Massive egos. That and the need for anonymity. Made bookkeeping an absolute nightmare.

Wonder Woman: Truthfully speaking, the whole thing had a short shelf-life right from the start. I mean, you can only be the next big thing for so long before you’re just another act filling airtime.

Zan (The Wonder Twins): You know you're screwed when your entire career can be summed up with a single catchphrase. Once in the late 70's I overheard two housewives shout "Wonder Twin powers activate!" in a supermarket. I just turned to Jayna and said, "Oh crap, here comes dinner theater."

Samurai: The moment Bruce Lee died so did my career. But that's what you get when you're a trendy character. Hell, Captain America doesn't even see a paycheck unless there's a Bush in the White House.

Robin: We all took it hard, especially Batman. By the end I had moved out of stately Wayne Manor. We still speak, occasionally meet for drinks or at fundraisers. But it’s not the same. Never will be.

The Flash: I just lost it. Did whatever I could to get the unpleasantness out of my mind…which only made things worse. I mean, when the cops caught me in that public restroom waving my...well, it didn't take a genius to guess what The Post headline would be the next day.

Green Lantern: I...I just wish I could say how sorry I was to all the people I hurt over the years...I mean, not the bad guys. They deserved to die. But I lost so, so many friends...

Wonder Woman: So much bitterness. So many unpaid bills. Eventually we all went our separate ways.

Hawkman: I paint. I do yoga. I even started shopping around a memoir...Sure, I miss the old days but...but I'm in a good place right now.

Superman: I’m still doing what I do best. I can’t say the collapse of the Justice League hindered my career…but I also can’t say I don’t miss it. We really had some good times together.

Jayna: Zan and I can now be seen in "Starlight Express" at the Westbury Music Fair from November 12 through Christmas. I play a diesel engine.

Black Vulcan: I have my own business now. I even still have some of the mementos from back then. Well, those I couldn’t pawn off on eBay.

Robin: Each day gets better than the next…

Wonder Woman: No more hard feelings. Not now…

Superman: It’s all good…

Aquaman: With Jesus comes forgiveness. And with forgiveness, peace.