Francesco
Marciuliano
We all grew
up with the Hardy Boys. Isnt it time they grew up with us?
Drink at Work.com is proud to introduce a new series of mystery
novels written specifically for an olderif not particularly
wisergeneration. Each edition in the new Hardy Men library
details the exciting adventures of our now middle-aged but still
intrepid heroes, including:
"The
Hardy Men and the Case of What's-His-Face, Y'know, That Guy...I
Think It Begins with an M." Yep, Frank and Joe are off
on their latest escapade, only to suddenly forget who they were
pursuing. Frank is certain he wrote it on the back of his shopping
list while Joe yells at his kids to keep quiet for just one goddamn
minute so he can think straight. Eventually the two go back to
the couch and watch SportsCenter.
"The
Hardy Men and the Missed Financial Opportunity That Really Could
Have Gotten Them Back on Their Feet." Recently downsized
from their jobs and trying to make ends meet, Frank and Joe are
let in on a sure-fire investment by Chet, only to be held back
by a now complete lack of self-confidence. The two then spend
the next several months dreaming about how they could have flaunted
their wealth in front of their so-called friends.
"The
Hardy Men and the Case of Those Thieving Bastards Down at the
Car Dealership." When Frank and Joe go to lease some
previously owned SUVs, little do they know that they'll be the
ones taken for a ride. But six hours and seven charges for "undercoating"
later, the brothers feel horribly violated and not all too certain
about how their wives will react to matching Serbian-manufactured
Yugos.
"The
Hardy Men Inadvertently Kill Most of Their Day at Home Depot Buying
the Wrong Drill Bit before Going to Brewsters Pub to Watch
Their Local Team Not Win Enough to Cover the Spread and Hear that
Hot New Piece of Ass behind the Bar Call Them "Old Timers"
and then Driving Home to Each Find Their Homes Foundation
Cracking, Their Boiler Dying and Their Youngest Son Being Encouraged
to Consider Only Trade Schools or Food Service Training Programs
at the Tender Age of Five." Frank and Joe go back to
Brewsters and drink themselves blind.
"The
Hardy Men Grow Eerily Silent While Flipping through Their High
School Yearbook." While looking for the DVD manual to
see how to remove a Dragon Ball Z figure out of the disc tray,
Frank stumbles across his old high school yearbook. The brothers
then spend the next three hours in quiet reflection, reliving
long-forgotten accomplishments, recalling all-too-fleeting glory
and imagining having sex with every single girl in their 12th
grade class.
So whether
you want to relive a childhood classic or just have something
to hide your face behind while your kids scream at each other
at the dinner table, the Hardy Men Mystery Novels will let you
experience true adventure without the usual shortness of breath
and aching joints that now seem to accompany everything you do.