Eventually there will come a time in your career when you are quite happy with your performance, your supervisor is quite pleased with your contributions and senior management is quite delighted with your admirable service to the company (of course, we’re assuming your career has something to do with a recognizable corporation or industry and does not require you use the phrase "knock-off Louis Vuitton bags" or "keep three plates spinning at once" to adequately define your occupation). And that time could last a few days, a few weeks or a few years, until your supervisor is still singing your praises, upper management is still a chorus of approval and you’re left wondering why if you’re doing such a great job you’re still cashing your weekly check at a corner falafel stand (unless you actually want a falafel, in which case you simply sign over your pay).

That’s when it’s time to ask for a raise, since clearly no such offer is coming from the company. And who could blame them? After all, if you had a goose that kept laying golden eggs whether you fed it or not, pretty soon that bird would be gnawing its own feet for nourishment.

Alas you, dear friend, are no goose. And so you must put your pride and professional stature on the line in hopes that all your huge projects over the years haven’t gone unnoticed or filed under "Hard Lessons Learned." But remember, money is an inherently crass affair (especially when it’s brought up in the context of "gimme more") and so any request for a salary increase must be done with the utmost care and civility.

• Know what you’re worth: You may have a million-dollar smile but unless your boss is a former dentist with a penchant for odd collectibles and a pair of pliers in his top drawer, your personal attributes won’t be worth a dime. Instead, focus on your professional value to the firm, stating, "Last year I brought in 12 new clients and made this company $10 million." If that fails to persuade your boss, then draw parallels with coworkers of equal stature but greater pay, like "Last year I brought in 12 new clients and made this company $10 million but Jenkins did your daughter."
  
  
• Know when to ask: When the company’s on a roll, it’s only fair that those who pushed the hardest get a piece of the action. But when business is so poor that your company has devolved into rival tribes, each with their own warlord, roaming gang and set of deities, asking for a few dollars more may not be prudent. Feel out the moment. If your boss is lighting his or her cigars or underlings with $1,000 bills, go for it. If senior management is setting their desks on fire for warmth, using toner cartridge ink as war paint and offering sacrifices to a three-hole puncher they now refer to as "The Great and Powerful Charlie," maybe reschedule the meeting for next fiscal quarter.
  
  
• Know how to stifle a sob: You may want a raise. You may deserve a raise. There may be no earthly reason why you shouldn’t get a raise. But that doesn’t guarantee that soon you’ll be eating two falafels a week instead of one. Should you be denied a raise, don’t get emotional. Get irrational. Repeatedly use the terms "The System," "The Man" and "Officer McNarc Narc" when directly addressing supervisors at department meetings. Show up to work wearing only a dickie and a smile. Use the CEO’s stationery to write rambling, threatening letters to cartoon characters. Anything to get management to exclaim, "For the sake of the company we better give that individual a raise, pronto!"
  

Next Week: How to Get Your Career Back on Track after Your Former Employer Has Had You Committed.