As usual, Tax Day is fast approaching and you know what that means: Tax Day is on its way! If you’re like billions of Americans, you’ve waited til the last-ish minute to file and now you’re a bundle of nerves because you’re afraid you’ll owe so much to Uncle Sam that you won’t be able to tell anyone when he touches your bathing-suit area.

But did you know there are many obscure deductions you can claim to help reduce your tax burden? It’s true!* Here are a some that might lower the amount you have to shell out to pay the government to infringe on your rights.

1. Facebook. Did you know you can deduct a portion of the time you spend on Facebook? It’s true!* All those hours you fritter away looking up old acquaintances, creating an artificial farm, clicking Like until your fingers bleed… write ‘em off! You see, every second you’re on Facebook goes into a large database used by marketers to sell you things. Things you don’t even know you want! So in a way, whenever you share a video of a kitten smoking or Poke someone you worked with 15 years ago, you’re helping the engine of capitalism surge forward. Why shouldn’t some of that money come back to you?

2. Worrying. Let’s face it, you’re an emotional wreck. You’re freaked out about the government, all those earthquakes, war, who’s going to win Dancing With The Stars… it’s all too much! And fretting makes you act impulsively. You eat too much crappy food, you drink to excess, you go on shopping sprees to make yourself feel better, if only for a few minutes. And it all boosts the economy! You can’t wait to throw money at the problem. And when the problem is you, your taxes should reflect that.

3. Ripoffs. Nowadays, everything is a scam. Nothing lives up to its promises. You bought a ticket to see Charlie Sheen live: RIPOFF. You bought yet another set of Space Bags because they swore up and down they were both new and improved: RIPOFF. You pay a through the face for premium cable and 99% of what’s on TV is even worse than Jersey Shore: RIPOFF. You lay out your hard-earned cash in good faith. When the thing you lay it out for turns out to be a classic flimflam, you can claim it on your taxes under the category of OTHER GRIFTS AND BUNKO.

We here at Drink At Work hope these tips will help make your Tax Day a little less intimidating. And if you actually end up using them, we have no idea who you are or what you’re talking about. Good Luck!

*Not true