#thatswhyyourmyex

Unfortunately, we are not authorized to to correct the hashtag’s incorrect spelling of YOU ARE as the possessive YOUR instead of the contraction YOURE (apostrophes are not welcome in trending, it seems). But we are authorized to provide an image that best reflects the spirit of it. Here now…is why you are my ex.

If you haven’t checked out honorary Drink At Worker Dan Bialek’s hilarious web series, Action Figure Therapy, you sir or madame are an ass. Now take a look as AFT’s Jungle Recon Trooper walks us all through a typical night out on the town.

You can find the rest of the AFT series here.

I wrote this a few years back when I was extremely angry about the direction of my career and the status of the comics and entertainment industry. I’m not the same person I was when I wrote it, but I wanted to come back to it and see if it still holds up. All vitriol aside, I think the general point I was trying to make is still valid today.

Plus, I’m proud of the writing. I remember it taking me quite a while, with several rewrites.

Words are fun to make a point with!

Anyway, I hope you enjoy it again, for the first time.

-Corey

Listen up, all you holier than thou Internet fucktards, Hell bent on blogging to me what’s cool and why, with your self-proclaimed “expert” status… I’m callin’ you out and I’m gonna kick your skinny little Indie asses if you don’t start to shape up. You can all take your little blogs, your YouTube diatribes and your crappy webcomics about World of Warcraft and shove ‘em up your tightened little sphincters. As a benefit to the stabilization of society, I’m offering some helpful advice to keep you from dying an angry mob-related death before you’re 30…

[More after the jump]