[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4FxdMi5WG0E] It’s official. I’m in a famous commercial. Someone tell my parents! Neither of whom I speak to! Also, call the police.

Oh Fox, you blow up things better than anyone else. HUMAN TARGET will feature both explosions and ‘splosions, depending on which region of the country you’ll be watching.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2pG4tRKsgXQ] Up to 34 viewings. Starting to crack up.

I’m staying in New York for the holidays, but I’m keeping myself charged by watching the Albert Finney SCROOGE musical 50 times in a row. I’ll try to check in with you guys as the day progresses. No, I’m fine. Thank you though. [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8RTOuVouYPU]

1. Drink 2. Be Drunk 3. Drink heavily 4. Enjoy a drink 5. Follow up #4 for with #3 6. Drink 7. DRINK! 8. (drink) 9. Remember to use with great frequency the phrase spoken 21 seconds into this clip of “Trading Places“ and finally… 10. Remember that life is short, so really take the [...]

I spend waaay too much time on Twitter reading other people’s posts. Usually, I feel less of a human after an hour or so, but the other day, I saw a post about one of my “followers” heading to Gritty’s in my former hometown of Portland, ME. Guys, Gritty’s was my bar. I knew 99% [...]