New DAW Feature: excerpts from "A WEALTHY PEOPLE'S HISTORY OF THE UNITED STATES"

We've waited almost 6 months now, until the near-eve of our nation's Independence Day, to begin releasing this following installment. That's how excited we are about it. Half a year's worth of excitement is built up and ready to be loosed all over your screens. Gross? Maybe. Wonderful? YES!

Why did we wait till now to release? Because the 4th of July is a day to celebrate our nation's greatness, our great feats, our great men and woman. Possibly women.

Yet doesn't it seem odd that the greatest member of our heroes past is not represented at all, not in any text book or documentary, that if you asked a random school child who America's Most American American was, the one name that would not come to his or her mind is JONAS MAYFEW HIGGENBOTTOM?

How did it come to pass that the one man to which this nation owes its livelihood and indeed its existence as a world power has been all but forgotten?

For this there is no simple answer. The most we can tell you is that there are powers out there, jealous powers, who have spent decades covering up the truth of our collective past. None of which we knew until we ran across one of the few copies still available of A WEALTHY PEOPLE'S HISTORY OF THE UNITED STATES, which we found in a Birmingham, Alabama BOOKS A MILLION store in their Debunking the Liberal Media section. More of a wing really.

Regardless, we contacted the author, and glory of glories, he gave us publishing rights for this special occasion. He even refused any kind of payment. He said that he simply wants our country to be better educated about its great history, about its great heroes, about its greatest man, Jonas Mayfew Higgenbottom. While "A Wealthy People's History" indeed reports upon the lives of several of the other titans of industry, the bulk of this tome is, and rightly so, devoted to Dr. Reverend Higgenbottom, from his early stages at Saint Giles School for Male Youth, to his days of strapping youngmanhoodedness in which he thrived as a professional adventurer/scientist, to his descending yet nonetheless magnificent years in which most of the edifices named after him were constructed, including the world famous Mid-Town Pyramid.

Without Further Ado...go to the next post. Wait, never mind, that actually was a bit of ado. What I should have written was:

With A Bit Further Ado...go to the next post.

So...go do that.