Drink at Work's Extended Family

Hey there -- it's Thursday night. Time to go buck wild. Or at least see some good sketch/stand up comedy over at The Green Room.

It's BYOB...plus we'll probably be bringing our own beer for Drink at Work supporters to Drink at Show.



Here's the specific info:

When: TONIGHT - Thurs. Jan 31st @ 10:30pm

Where: The Green Room at 45 Bleecker Street
(just East of Lafayette Street)

How Much: $12

So...hopefully we'll see you there. And don't forget to bring a six pack.

The Drink at Work Show - 01/19/08

Sean Crespo - On Being Spiderman

ECNY Awards Video

For the last few months I've been working with Alex Goldberg (Fearsome), Alex Zalben (Elephant Larry), Jon Friedman (The Rejection Show), and Nate (The Apiary) on reviving the ECNY Awards, New York's original comedy awards show. I was particularly excited when I was asked to be a part of the production team, not just because I love big, pompous awards shows (though I do), but because it's one of the few ways we have of forcing press and industry to take a look at the talented, but less known performers we work with everyday in small comedy rooms all over the city. Sure, a lot of the bigger names carried away the awards on Monday, but I thought the nominees represented a strong spectrum of the varied talent in the city. I'm hoping that in subsequent years we can bring in more comics who are firmly entrenched in the club scene as well.

The ECNYs also became a great artistic endeavor for me as I got to produce our opening video featuring as many of the nominees as we could wrangle. With the assistance of the other producers as well as my fellow DAW nominee Sean, I shot this over two days at Ochi's Lounge (downstairs at Comix) with my Panasonic DVX 101B, Sennheiser shotgun mic, Tram lav mic, and Lowell DV light kit. With a few more lights and slightly larger space I could have done this without requiring too much post-production fussing in Final Cut, but I did the best I could with what I already had. Ultimately, I'm really happy with the way this turned out and I'm especially thankful to everyone who helped and stopped by for the interview.

For the geeks: the Garbage Filter saved my life on several of these takes as getting the perfect white background was difficult with larger groups. For Olde English's takes especially, I used about 4 different garbage mattes. It's not perfect, but it did the job well enough.

Desk, Post-It Note, Lamp AKA My Cloverfield Review Vlog

Click here or the image above to watch it.

Five Powerful, Confusing, and Unsettling Sandwich Oaths

By the Six Moons of Telarbuus, I vow to avenge the devouring of this Open Faced Reuben with the blood of a hundred million self-aware cats!

I swear by the Throne of the Elodian Sword, I WILL savor the next Rancho Black Bean Salsa Panini I order or verily the lands of mine own seventh son's seventh son shall be forever awash in hate-juice!

Lo, quickly and in the deep black of midnight was my Portobello Steak on a Whole Wheat Bun taken from me, and thus also in this manner shall I visit my just wrath upon those who stole it...MOM.

#8 With Relish...I will wed you before Winter's Moon or spend the rest of my pitiful life drawing caricatures of prominent European fiscal analysts!

Thanksgiving Every Day Wrap, you shall know the twin titans of Woe and Loss this day for I swear by my lunch break's end....you shall consist of naught else but a toothpick with crinkly red cellophane atop you and half of the side pickle that comes with you.

DAW in Pictures - 01/19/08 (via Mindy Tucker)

David Cope

Sven Wechsler

Sean Crespo as Bruce Springsteen

Mark Douglas

Neil Padover

Benari Poulten

Thanks to Mindy Tucker!
See more of her work here: http://withreservation.com

Shoot The Messenger with guest Nick Flynn!

Dear thoughtful humans disgusted by the toothless media, double-faced politicians, corporate scumbags and anyone else who uses their powers for evil:

Join us over at Shoot The Messenger for an evening of catharsis and hilarity at the expense of the aforementioned. Shoot The Messenger is a satirical wrap-up of the week's news from the brain of Daily Show co-creator Lizz Winstead. A live sketch-comedy show incorporating multi-media elements, it gives us the world as seen through the filters of the fictional producers and on-air talent at "Wake-up World" - America's first and only 6 hour Morning Show which is coincidentaly on 24/7, America's first and only infonewsment network.

AND TONIGHT....Award-winning author and journalist Nick Flynn is coming down to be interviewed by Lizz Winstead. If you haven't read his book Another Bullshit Night in Suck City, then come listen to the man and find out why you should.

PLUS, the great immigration debate!

The 24/7 network's resident everything experts, Hunter Carlsbad (Barbarians at the Gate) and Daniels Midland (The Complication Room) will be duking it out one opinion at a time. Hunter and Daniels will cover points of view from both the extreme-far-right and the center--far-right so it will be a genuinely balanced debate!

Then it's our Race to the Cure as our election coverage continues in full force. And as always we'll have another visit from Lifing Expert Dana Levan who will be talking about how you ladies can save time by gtting your own handicapped parking stickers.

So join Hope and -- freshly returned from his tour of North American Olive Garden restaurants-- Davis for a fun filled morning... TONIGHT!

Doors at 8
Show at 8:30
The Cabaret Under Acme

9 Great Jones btwn Broadway/Lafayette
COST: 10 BUCKS
TICKETS: www.ticketweb.com

NOTE: Starting in February, Shoot The Messenger will be moving to nearby Green Room, also the location on Jan. 31 of Drink At Work's EXTENDED FAMILY. Details to follow.

The Drink at Work Show Highlights - 01/12/08

New DBLK Podcast Is Up - Episode 04 - Interview With Sam Means

In this episode of the Dan Bialek Loves Kittens Podcast I interview Daily Show writer and author Sam Means about his new satirical book A Practical Guide To Racism.

Click here to listen to or download it:

danvsamerica.com podcast page

The book is available now at www.apracticalguidetoracism.com and also Amazon.com.

Please add the book's "author" C.H. Dalton as your Myspace friend if you'd like to view his very funny webisodes.

Drink At Work's EXTENDED FAMILY is coming!

Thursday January 31 at 10:30 pm, tune in to a very special episode of The Drink At Work Show.

It's Drink At Work's EXTENDED FAMILY. If this show doesn't move you, you should just die.

Thank you. That is all.

Jesse Popp at 50 First Jokes

The sound and video quality isn't great on this but this was one of my favorite moments of a really fun night. Jesse Popp is a good friend and a great comic. This is his first joke of 2008, performed at John F. O'Donnell, Jiwon Li and Claudia Cogan's fantastic 50 First Jokes Show. Thanks to them for producing a great event, and thanks to Brad Steuernagel for posting this. Enjoy!

Progressively Insane Email Subject Headings I Have Used When Dealing with Sallie Mae

SUBJECT: I'll get you your damn money now let me die in peace.

SUBJECT: Ms. Mae, you may have qualified for LEAVING ME ALONE. This offer is good forever. But use it now please.

SUBJECT: This will never work, Sallie! You know it won't. I'm from the wrong side of the tracks and you're a non-corporeal loan institution. But damnitall I love you!

SUBJECT: Did you get the free Kevlar vests I sent you? If not, contact the post office cause time is running out.

SUBJECT: I bet if you converted my debt into chickens, we could feed Africa. Why do you hate Africa, Sallie Mae?

SUBJECT: I NEED you. NEED with a capital PLEASE!

SUBJECT: Due to a temporary strike of the union representing the spiders that reply to all my emails for me, this will be the last email you get from me until those spiders are fairly compensated.

SUBJECT: Dr. Jones, I have found the Temple of Aanco Mayna. STOP. Further instructions? STOP. The boy eating his weight in mammals and lugo-berri fruits daily as requested. STOP. He took out a village alone last night. STOP. That magical amulate really works! FULL STOP.

SUBJECT: Let's play the Crying Game!!!!

New Dan Bialek Loves Kittens Podcast Is Up - Episode #3 "Raj Desai Interview"

On this episode I interview Comedy Central Open Mic Fight finalist and my good friend comedian Raj Desai.

The first two-thirds we talk about Raj and his comedy career.

The last third of our conversation we spend recapping the awful week that I've been having.

Click here or the image above to listen to it.

That's It. I'm Done.

I'm through fighting with billion-dollar, conservative-owned social networking websites designed for teenagers. I'm through getting mad at D-List celebrities who get me in trouble.

I'm just going to focus on writing funny blogs, making funny vlogs and tour videos and doing standup -- like I intended in the first place.

I'm putting up one last, plain vanilla Myspace page so I can interact with fans and friends and keep them abreast of my latest tour dates and venue additions as well my new videos, podcasts and other features on my website.

I'm a grown man. Not a little girl in a Hello Kitty store. I don't have time for this cyber bickering shit.

Here's the last personal Myspace page I (hopefully) will ever create for myself. If it gets deleted I'm going to say f it all and go back to using Friendster.

http://www.myspace.com/danbialekloveskittens

One of my fans put it best, Myspace is like money I hate the very idea of it but that's what everyone uses so for now it will have to do.

Big Brother Really Is Watching, And In This Case Deleting

Here's what my new Myspace page looked like this morning when I woke up:



Wow, I must have really pissed someone off. They deleted and/or blocked the About Me section of my page.

Here's what it used to say:

My name is Dan Bialek. I was the number one ranked comedian on the Myspace Top Comedian rankings from October 27, 2007 to January 8, 2008 when Myspace deleted my account after I made fun of two of their most famous comedians in a blog article on an unrelated site.

To become number one I used a process called "viewjacking." A lot of comedians on Myspace use it to inflate their video counts and place themselves higher on the Myspace Top Comedian charts than they should be. Myspace knew about it for weeks (probably months) before they deleted my profile. A lot of their "top" comedians still featured on their site still use it today to bolster their positions on the site.

When I discovered this last summer I used this process to make myself number one just as a goof and then ended up remaining at the top of the Myspace Comedy charts for almost 3 months.

Basically I beat a multi-billion dollar using a piece of free software and a couple of computers that I picked up at Goodwill for under $30.

Myspace's Comedy page is a total fraud. The people at the top of their rankings (including me) are nowhere near the funniest comedians in comedy today. Where are Dave Chappelle, Chris Rock or Dave Attell on the rankings?

Also, out of the 4 comics they feature every week on their Comedy page one is usually actually funny or famous (rarely both). The other 2 or 3 are usually awful and have been placed their due to nepotism, networking or because someone wants to fuck them. Not all of the time, but enough to make you wonder why they even feature comedians at all.

Anyway, I think the system sucks. And I wanted to do something about it. So, I made myself number one. And now that Myspace has deleted me in order to dethrone me, I want to offer you the opportunity to be "number one" as well.

This video will show you and anyone else who has a high speed internet connection and a spare computer lying around how to become 1 on Myspace Comedy and how to get millions of video views for free. Enjoy.

Creepy as shit if you ask me.

I guess it's not really "my" space so much as it is theirs.

Local on the 5's Featured On Comedysmack.com

Click here to watch this great video featuring some of the DAW team and appearing today on COMEDYSMACK.com

Myspace "Artist On Artist" Q & A

Two Questions:

1. Does Samantha Ronson have Down Syndrome or is she just really ugly and stupid looking?

2. Does her brother Mark Ronson get grossed out when he has sex with her, not because she's his sister but because she doesn't have a penis?


Just wondering.

My New Myspace Profile Page

Myspace are a bunch of cockdongs and they deleted my profile yesterday.

Here's my new one:

http://www.myspace.com/danbialekloveskittens

Let's see how long it takes for them to delete this one, the fucking cuntards.

How To Beat Myspace Comedy & Get 2 Million Video Views For Free

Yes, this really works.

And, yes, Myspace has known about this for weeks (probably months) and only kicked me off after I made fun of Dane Cook and Carlos Menica in a blog that I wrote for WhipItOutComedy.com earlier today.

Click here to read it.

The Myspace.com comedy rankings are a fraud and many of their "top" comics are using just this same system.

Take that, bitches.


How To Beat Myspace Comedy & Get 2 Million Views A Month For Free:

1. Go to www.firefox.com

2. Download the free Mozilla Firefox browser and save the file to your desktop

3. Install Mozilla Firefox

4. Launch Firefox

5. Cut and paste this URL:

https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/fi refox/search?q=reloadevery&status=4

and hit return

6. On the ReloadEvery page click "Install Now"

7. When Firefox restarts open up your Myspace profile in the browser window

8. Then click on "Videos"

9. Then click on the video you wish to get millions of hits on

10. Then click on the small black triangle on the Reload button

11. In the drop-down menu select "Reload Every 5 Seconds"

12. Open two to three more browser windows and repeat steps 5 through 10 in each

Let run and before you know it you'll have thousands of views a day and over 30 days of continuous use of this practice well over 2 million views total.

A Fake Rockstar's passing thoughts™

I've determined what my Hell will be:

Locked in a room with Julia Roberts laughing at Oprah Winfrey saying "Vajayjay".


---------End Transmission----------

Cat Vagina Story

Our cat, David Taylor, went into heat over the weekend.

Here's what happened when I tried to find her help on the Internet to little avail.

Click here or the image above to watch.

Dear Every Woman at the Bar by Carol Hartsell

Come out to support Sean and Shayna at the Live at Gotham Auditions Tonight!

9:30 PM Show
COMEDY CENTRAL'S LIVE AT GOTHAM AUDITIONS



Comics perform to earn a coveted spot on
Comedy Central's Live at Gotham.

Scheduled to Perform:
Nick Cobb, Rich Francese, Dena Blizzard, Luke Cunningham, Sean Crespo, Shayna Ferm, Pete Cestaro, Vince August

$15 Cover +
2 Beverage Minimum per Person

FOR RESERVATIONS CALL 212.367.9000