MUFFIN FLAVORS THAT SHOULDN'T EXIST

1. Berries and Aluminum

2. Knifey

3. Mayoral Incumbent N Bran

4. Bog

5. Poison Rape Crunch

6. Methane Taste-splosion (now with slaughterhouse hammer pommels)

7. Double Homocide BANANA BASH!

8. Cinnamon Blood Libel Swirl

9. Sweat from the shirt of a WWI Doughboy who spent three straight months in a trench in Avignon, France slowly watching his left leg succumb to gangrene while his commanding officer went insane from syphilis and the rest of his company was blown apart by mortar fire or eaten by starving dogs.

10. Nebula Award Winning Author Orson Scott Card