Diary of a Runaway Dog

Day One
Apparently I’ve run away from home.

Day Two
Can’t find way back. Will find “real America” instead.

Day Three
Dug a hole. Fell in.

Day Four
Made it with two dogs. Three of us tried to live off the land. Then sprinkler system turned on.

Day Five
Wandered into small town. Got bad looks from parents and storeowners. What’s gone wrong with this country?

Day Six
Ate a wild mushroom. Mind greatly expanded. No longer am I “man’s dog." Tore off collar and ran naked into street.

Day Seven
Dropped completely out of society. Joined roaming gang of discarded plastic bags.

Day Eight
It's real hard to be free when you are bought and sold in the marketplace.

Day Nine
Have come far in journey. Have made great strides, both geographically and spiritually. May not have found “real America” but have discovered a distant point—an unspoiled province—that I can truly call my own.

Day Ten
Fell in large hole someone dug.