Auction Items Recently Banned on eBay

Tahitian Hooker--Torso

Sextuplets #3, 4 and 6

Carl Yastrzemski (Bat Included)

Sentient 1958 Plymouth Fury

Neighbor's dog that just won't shut up

12 hard-working laborers with absolutely no grasp of worker's rights

Missing Vermeer, sold in one-inch squares

Original print of "Steamboat Willie" in which Clara Bow blows Mickey Mouse behind a jazz club while Fatty Arbuckle watches

Any and all copies of "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band: The Movie" DVD

Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator