"She Was Placed in the Back of Officer Scott's Patrol Unit Where, According to Officers, She Urinated."

Reading Comprehension Quiz
The following is an actual newspaper report printed in Oklahoma's Tuttle Times. Please read the report carefully and then take a few moments to answer the corresponding questions. You may begin now.

Argument Ends with Pickup in Pond
By Regina Garvie
A fight about gambling started a married couple down a path that would end with their pickup being driven into a Tuttle pond.

According to Tuttle police reports, the incident began when Eddie Pauley, 24, and Patricia Pauley, 22, of Oklahoma City, visited some friends in Tuttle on Saturday. Both of the Pauleys told police that they had been drinking at their friends' home, and Eddie passed out in their truck, a 2000 black Chevrolet Silverado. When he woke up, his wife was driving to the casino in Newcastle. Eddie told police that he was angry that his wife was going to gamble, so he took over and started back towards their friends' home on South Frisco.

The report says that just east of Coffey's Mini Storage, about six and a half miles east of downtown Tuttle, Patricia became angry, and began hitting Eddie and kicking the steering wheel. Eddie lost control and drove into the mini storage facility. When employees there came up to the Pauleys, Eddie got into the back of the pickup and Patricia got behind the wheel.

The Pauleys told police that Patricia drove out onto Hwy. 37 without yielding, where she was struck by one vehicle and hit another. No one was seriously injured in either accident, which involved a vehicle driven driven by an 18-year-old and one driven by a 17-year-old.

Eddie Pauley told police that at that point, he was thrown out of the truck bed and remembers waking up in a yard. He left, returning on foot to his friends' house on Frisco Road.

Patricia, still believing Eddie was in the back of the pickup, drove east on Hwy. 37. She turned down Ridgecrest Road, about one-half mile east of the mini storage facility, and went down to the end of that road. Once there, she turned the pickup around and started back south.

According to the police report, Patricia said that she does not remember anything after the turn, but witnesses at the scene saw her jump out of the truck before it reached Hwy. 37 again. Unmanned, the pickup crossed Hwy. 37, went through a fence, and drove into a pond until it was completely submerged.

Upon arriving on the scene, officers observed that Patricia appeared to be "very intoxicated," according to the reports.

"I could smell a very strong odor of an alcoholic beverage on her breath and person," said Sgt. Jason Lanier in his report. "She was also very unsteady on her feet and had red, watery eyes."

Officer Michael Scott asked Patricia how much she had had to drink, and she told him she had three beers through a "beer bong," according to his report.

Patricia tried repeatedly to walk out onto Hwy. 37, then started to take off her clothes, according to reports, and when officers told her to put her clothes back on, she asked to get into a police car. She was placed in the back of Officer Scott's patrol unit where, according to officers, she urinated.

She told the officers that her husband was still under the water, but when Sgt. Lanier told her witnesses had seen her husband leaving the scene on foot, she threatened to sue and shouted obsenities. Lanier wrote in his report that he then asked Patricia for a description of her husband, and she told him she didn't remember, but his shirt was white.

Officer Scott asked Patricia why she had exited the pickup, and she told him she had fallen out, but didn't know how or why. She then told Scott that she had hurt her wrist and head, and wanted medical attention. She was taken to Grady Memorial Hospital by Tuttle EMS.

The Grady County Sheriff's Office Dive Team was called to the scene, and dive officers Chuck Berryhill and Gary Redburn attached tow cables for the pickup's retrieval.

Tuttle police officers searched for Eddie Pauley, who was seen by witnesses running south on Sara Road and in a creek in the 5500 block of Hwy. 37, for more than an hour, but did not find him.

Eddie drove Patricia to the police station on Monday to pick up her wallet, and agreed to talk to officers. Although he admitted to drinking before he drove, he was not cited for DUI since officers were unable to test him at the time.

Eddie Pauley was cited on one count of leaving the scene of an accident. Patricia Pauley was cited for failing to yield from a private drive, leaving the scene of a property damage accident, and driving under the influence.


1.When Eddie Pauley eventually awoke in the passenger seat of the couple's pickup truck, where did his wife Patricia say she was driving to?
a. The August Strindberg Marathon
b. The Coachella Valley and the carrot festival therein
c. The nearest opportunity to piss away their previous day's scratch-off winnings

2.What does Patricia Pauley believe to be her husband's most salient feature?
a. His piercing blue eyes
b. His infectious laugh
c. His singular predilection for clothing

3.When Eddie Pauley eventually awoke after being thrown from a moving truck bed, what was the very first thing he remembered?
a. That this is exactly what his junior high school guidance counselor said would happen to him if he didn't apply himself
b. That what that flirty Denny's waitress over on Highway 37 lacked in looks she more than made up for in ass
c. That it's a good thing he didn't land on his own lawn because it was recently repossessed by U-Rent

4.What song do you think Eddie and Patricia Pauley requested their wedding DJ play for their very first dance as husband and wife?
a. Strokin'
b. Where Were You (When the World Stopped Turning)
c. "Some fuckin' Merle Haggard, bitch!"

5.When Eddie Pauley eventually awoke in his own backyard Monday morning after running for 36 hours straight, what was his immediate conclusion?
a. "You know what this place could use? A koi pond."
b. "The Rock ruled the ring! He ruled it!"
c. "Pat better be inside making me my scrapple."

6.Why did Patricia Pauley start to take her clothes off after she was arrested?
a. She didn't want the police to ruin her good halter top
b. She misunderstood her Miranda rights
c. She thought she was at work

7.What do you believe is the City of Tuttle's biggest claim to fame?
a. This very story
b. A now damaged Mini Storage
c. That it doesn't know it shares a name with a character in the film Brazil

8.If the Pauleys have a dog, what might its name be?
a. Spinoza
b. Dokken
c. Deputy Enos Strate

9.Why did Patricia Pauley tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle if she believed her husband Eddie was still inside?
a. Because no one gets between a lady and the video poker capital that is Newcastle
b. To collect on the $48 in insurance money
c. Why is man prone to violence? Why isn't "phonetic" spelled the way it sounds? Some things we may never know.

10.What do you think the Pauleys' fellow parishioners will say to them at service?
a. "Been there, dude."
b. "L'Chaim."
c. "The Rock ruled the ring! He ruled it!"