Good Bo, Bad Bachus

Dear Alabama,

I love you. I didn't leave you because I hate you, I was just looking for something else. It wasn't you. It was me. We're still friends and we always will be. When you rejoice, I rejoice. And when you cry, I cry. Bo Bice was robbed. We all know it. But do you know why? I do.

Two words: Spencer Bachus.

You don't call for the censorship and dismissal of a cable television personality (i.e. someone that subscribers PAY to see) without suffering the consequences (or in this case, without causing your constituents to suffer the consequences).

Alabama had become America's sweetheart. We had Ruben. We had an impressive showing of THREE Survivor contestants. We had Bo. Sweet singin', rockin', hunka-burnin' bad-boy-made-good love Bo. He COULDN'T lose. Not to that twit with the ever-more-twisty hair and beedy eyes.

Something happened, and it wasn't that pot story. America loves pot. It also loves it's pithy, satirical comedians. If you attack them, America starts to ask questions. Who are you? Where did you come from? Well, who voted for you? Oh REALLY?! Well, we'll show them. We can vote, too!

Bo gave us the beat, boys. And then Bachus gave us the finger. It's guilt by association is all. But if Alabama wants another reality television hero, it might do well to mind who it sends out to represent them in the real reality bizarro world.

Yours in specious reasoning,
Carol